Why Do I feel So Alone?

My early years were a time of deep aloneness. My family moved many times as I grew, and I never had time to develop friendships. I was always the new kid on the block or school. In addition, as an identical twin, most could not tell the difference between us so that they referred to us as the twins, they rarely called us by name so as not to make a mistake. I often felt quite alone and friendless.

I have found that feeling in so many people I meet. The aloneness does not always come from moving or being a twin, but absent parents or alcoholic parents, or simply fear of being “found out”. The reasons are many, but the feeling is the same. There are very few who felt secure and with deep friendships as they grew up and those that had the luxury of friendships, often times were disappointed later in life. So, the feeling of aloneness seems to permeate most of our lives.

God never intended for any of us to be lonely or isolated from others. I know that the opposite is true. John’s gospel says:

“Greater love has no one than this, that he lay down his life for his friends. You are my friends if you do what I command. I no longer call you servants, because a servant does not know his master’s business. Instead, I have called you friends, for everything that I learned from my Father I have made known to you.” (John 15:13-15)

For most of us, we struggle with connecting with our children. We see them as they struggle with the same struggles we may have encountered as we grew older. We see them put on a mask to hide some of the loneliness they are encountering, and we want so desperately to help and to share but they are, like us, so independent and knowing. This question is one we need to answer in order to share our legacy with meaning and power. We need to be able to articulate the reality of loneliness and the disappointments of friends on this earth. There is no one, including our spouse, that can fill the hole in our heart that God has reserved for Himself.

God invites us to become his friend through His son Jesus. The knowledge of Jesus and believing He died on the cross and is risen is not enough! He calls us to a deep meaningful friendship. So many “Christians” say that they believe and talk about salvation without being able to share what that friendship feels like and how meaningful that friendship is. Jesus gave everyone one of us that calls ourselves a Spirit to help us and to guide us and to grow us. So if we are confused about how to become friends with Jesus and what it takes, pray to the Spirit for help and guidance.

I can say personally, that Jesus has gotten me through some very tough times and has been a comfort to me and hope to me when there was no hope. For those who do not know what that is, this may sound a bit mysterious and strange. That is where trust comes in and reading God’s word comes in. The Spirit will help you understand the Bible so don’t hesitate to delve in. For those who have not been daily reading the Bible, start with the gospel of John and read a chapter a day. For those do read the Bible, start each year and read it completely by the end of the year. Yes, read the old testament. There are lots of aids available to get through the Bible in a year. For the Spirit will help you see God and Jesus in a whole different light and will reveal to you His love and His mercy and His hope for the future. Trust me, this is a worthy project.

Imagine for a moment, if this is not the case, a personal friendship with the King of the Universe, Jesus. Maybe that seems impossible, and even a bit weird. Imagine… Know this.

Jesus pursues us every second of every day and will never stop.

He wants our friendship and love. He loves us first to show us what true love looks like. He told us that He wants to be our friend and He promised to be there for us every second of every day. Tell me one friend who could say that to you and really mean it?



Download The Master’s Plan!

This is a book about transforming your family legacy – both today and in generations to come.  It is for Christian families who want to eliminate estate and capital gains taxes, maintain their current lifestyle, pass on an appropriate inheritance to their heirs, maximize giving to worthy ministries, create healthier family relationships and leave a lasting legacy to impact God’s kingdom.

joe-sturnioloBy Joe Sturniolo
Christian Family Legacy and Wealth Planning
Joe believes that stronger families are the vehicle God uses to bring about significant impact for His Kingdom.

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